Melanie’s Religious Tirade

I received a handwritten letter in the mail today from a Jehovah’s Witness that was personally addressed to me.  They also threw in their Watchtower pamphlet about honesty.

Many people’s first reaction to Jehovah’s witness propaganda is an eye roll and a polite “no thanks.”  We don’t even think about it.  Unless you’re depressed enough to want to seek answers from an outside source.  From a faith that actually cared enough to reach out in the first place.

These people don’t get paid to mail letters or go door to door.  I mean let’s cut them some slack, they’re not so bad.  They’re especially not so bad since each one of them know’s for a fact that God will only choose 144,000 of them to join him in heaven and here they are at your door, ruining their odds of salvation if you choose to convert.

Receiving a letter that isn’t a bill, a coupon, a credit card offer…etc, well, it’s kind of refreshing.  It’s nice getting a letter from a complete stranger who wants no money or response from me what-so-ever.  They just want me to read the pamphlet and feel better.

Okay, so I didn’t actually read the pamphlet, but maybe I’ll get around to it.  I’ll stick it in the bathroom where I take my holy shits.

But what if every religion did that?  Went door to door?

Mormon’s would arrive at your door and say, “join us, we believe dark skinned people are dark because they’re being punished by God!”

Catholic’s would come to your door and say, “Join us where there are no gays, premarital sex, and no abortions or STD protection!”

Muslims will ring your bell and say, “Your religion is punishable by death, so join us.”

With Jehovah’s witness it’s, “Join us because all other religions are demonically inspired!  But you can’t receive blood transfusions, vote, or judge anyone guilty in the court of law.”

I’m trying to find something bad on Judaism but it’s not there.  Rabbi’s even preform same-sex marriages, believe in condoms, they can marry and have kids, marijuana is kosher, and the best one of all is they want all Jew’s to believe in God using their heads, not their hearts.  They are against blind faith and want you to believe in God due to evidence and rational thought which is something ayahuasca told me and it’s super important.

I always liked their religion, but Hinduism is still in my top spot.  It can be traced back to circa 10000 B.C!  Compare that to 1400 B.C for Judaism….pff, small potato’s.  Just kidding.

Jehovah’s believe Jesus was God’s son, and not God himself.  While Catholics/Christians on the other hand, believe they are the same man.

Ayahuasca told me that we’re all God’s children and we are all equal to him.  We’re equal to him because we ARE him.  So according to ayahuasca, Jehovah’s and Christians are both correct if you combine the two.  Maybe if we combine all the religions together, we’ll find absolute truth?

Believing in a religion and preaching about it reminds me of those ormus people from my last post.  The people who believe ormus will bring them enlightenment or superpowers.  They get transfixed on it and once you’re transfixed, other people will think you crazy.  Especially if what you’re spouting is metaphysical whimsy.

I know exactly what it’s like to be transfixed.  It’s a spell and an odd form of denial.  In fact, I’m probably transfixing right now which will lead me to embarrassment when I read this post later.  It happens to everyone once they snap out of it.

We’re naturally inclined towards transfixing because it gives us structure, something to hold onto and base our perspectives on.  It’s an addiction, really.  You can tell it’s an addiction because you’ll need to replace it quickly with another addiction if it fails you.  If you don’t replace it, there won’t be any reason to live or at least, live happily (depending on the severity of your addiction).

Everyone’s transfixed on something or other.  And most people are ready to stand up to defend their belief system because their ego depends on it for survival.

The best way to learn something is by teaching it.  When I was younger and learning something new, I always pretended like I was teaching it to my imaginary friend.  So if you’re transfixed and compelled to share with people, you’re really just sharing it in order to teach it over again to yourself.  A way to construct your own acropolis, your own belief system.  By telling others, you make it more real and fortify its defenses.

Oh man I’m freaking tired.  I had a long day, sorta.

But anyway, when I write my book, I want to include my own religion into it.  Make it cohesive and 3 dimensional.  I want to sift out all the truths in all the religions and put them together in one united system of belief.  I’ll try to do this with the least amount of transfixing as possible.

That sounds like fun to me.

And of course time travel.  I can’t forget to include time travel in my book.

And to never take anything seriously, or believe in anything that isn’t empirical rational thought, and to always have a case of beer in your car just in case.

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Filed under philosophy, random thoughts

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