I’m going through a very strange crisis.
I’m out of my mind – it’s a dank cluttered up mess in there, so I had to get out. A couple of birds flew the coop with me and are now flying around my head one by one trying to steal my sanity. No wait, they’re not birds – they’re penguins! Crazy eyed penguins trying to steal my sanity.
Scoot, scam, getoutta here penguins!
And so I come to you blog, my friend. You’ll listen to me, right? The only two things in life I can count on are my fingers and my blog, and okay, sometimes my toes. I can’t leave out those gangly pigs.
I don’t know what’s going on with me. I can’t separate myself away from my crisis. I am the crisis. People don’t know they’re crazy because they are their illness. The thought of that doesn’t comfort me like it should.
I started writing The Secret Deciphered: Part Two five days ago and haven’t been able to stop. I can’t stop writing it and it’s getting out of hand. Every time I think it’s finished, I go back to do a final scan and end up writing more and more….and more.
For five days straight now, I stayed up until 5 a.m doing this.
“Okay, it’s done. Finished. Do you hear me you big fat 3,000 word blog post? Well, do ya?”
Blog – “……”
“Don’t just stare at me blinking you damn lily-livered logging lover curser you, why I outta…..”
Blog – “……..”
“Wait a tick, what is this? What the shit am I talking about here? Nobody’s going to understand a word of it. No, I can’t have that in my blog. Curser! Where are you…There you are. Delete that paragraph for me ASAP.”
The curser complies.
I end up deleting entire paragraphs, only to replace them with three or more – sometimes ten more. Granted, my ADD writing style keeps those paragraphs short, but still. This post is driving me mad – MAD I say! I don’t even want to look at it. I’m dreading going over there – dreading!
I’m so tired and weary. I just want to sleep tonight. I miss sleep. I feel empty inside when I don’t sleep. Like I’m a faint shadow of a zombie trolling about, looking for brains. Where are my brains?! I don’t know mister zombie sir, I’m just your shadow.
On my drive to work today, I started mulling over the possibility of transforming The Secret Deciphered: Part Two into an Ebook. Everyone’s doing it these days, so why not?
It will be a small whisper of a book, barely an idea. It’s just another post – a long freaking whopper of a post, but in Ebook style. I mean, that’s the only way people will read it, right? Who wants to read 3,000 word blog posts?
Writing a book is a lot more romantic than just plain old blogging. It would be the next step in my “writing career.”
It’s ironic that this particular post is the one I want published. It’s all about setting limitations for yourself and avoidance of doing scary things, or things that take “too much work.”
I think it’s a real gem, honestly. But at the same time, it’s so far out there. I mean, I really went deep with this one. And there’s still so much I want to put into it. It’s like I contracted cholera, shit pours out.
When I blog, yes, shit pours out, but I feel the need to keep my entries short. I feel like I’m going to lose my marbles when I write long posts. But a book on the other hand, now we’re talking my style. I’m allowed to go into more detail, more stories, more everything! I am completely free of restraint.
I don’t care about the money part. Let’s be reasonable here, it’s highly unlikely I’ll make a dime off it. Especially when I’m planning to sell it for 99 cents.
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