Math is crap

Each of these crowns consists of similar "...

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Have you ever met a brilliant person that you can learn something from?  How did they get so exceptional?  What makes them so different from me?  I’ll tell you how they’re different – they are great thinkers.  They think so damn much that they became good at it.

It’s so apparently obvious what has to be done to become a better you.  You have to think.  Seriously, it’s that simple.

Nobody thinks anymore.

I’ve been noticing my train of thought lately – really taking heed of it.  It’s always the same questions, same statements, same annoyances.  repetitive – really freaking repetitive.  When do the gems have time to sneak in through all that poop in my head?

How can I bring myself to a higher state of consciousness?  How can I become more self-aware?  Should I refrain from using the word ‘poop’ as often as I do?

Once I become comfortable with who I am, I’ll be unshakable to outside influences which in turn can eliminate half the unwanted jargon swimming around in my poop-soup brain.  Stew rather, poop stew brain.

What the real issue at hand is this:  It’s 9:30 pm and I spent the whole day avoiding studying.

Math is analytical, not creative.  It’s not personal or emotional.  It doesn’t emit any feel good vibes that give me energy to keep me lively and entertained for hours on end, no.  It’s shit.  Math is crap.  Crap crap crap.  Is that repetitive thought?  It’s crap in a handbag.  Crap on a stick.

I have to figure out a way to like math.  All my life I used the creative, intuitive side of my brain – it’s developed nicely into a finely tuned instrument (at least I hope), and now I have to develop the analytical side now, which I believe, can be done.

How can I like math?  Maybe it’s the easy, boring stuff that bogs my spirit – possibly it gets better?  More interesting?  I have to WANT to do it.  How can I want to do it?  I want to paint and play the guitar, learn the piano – I want to build a desk out of a tree that I chopped down myself (lol, it would look like a stump).

I have so many interests.  The only reason I became a massage therapist was because I didn’t know what else to do.   I couldn’t pick just one thing, so I picked nothing for a very long time.  That’s the truth.  I’ve had numerous clients ask me why I chose this field, and I would tell them, in mid-massage, I would tell them it’s because I didn’t know what else to do.

I was attracted to massage because I liked the hours.  Short hours, good money.  I can do massage until my calling strikes.

This is a very similar experience with many people – that they didn’t know what else to do.  They got roped into something because of the hours, maybe a promotion or pay raise – path of least resistance, you know?

I need to wake up my brain and think a bit. How can I like math?  I need to really think about this.  The answer will come, I know it will.  I’m not thinking like a mathematician.  Mathematician’s chose that field because they are good with numbers.  What makes them so good with numbers?

I was born under the same sun as Galileo, our brains are of equal size and mass.  I’ll start my math journey by finding a math goal.  I’ll use Galileo’s famous quote about math being the language of the universe.  Maybe that will jump start me.

Pythagoras was a philosopher who I believe became a mathematician by necessity in order to find answers to philosophical questions.  I like that idea – that I can relate to.

I’m going to watch tv now and drink some tea.

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Filed under random thoughts, rant, Self help

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