I want a mail order bride

As soon as I move out of my parents house and get a better job, I’m gonna get me one of them there brides in the mail.  I’m very particular though.  She has to be Japanese because she must know how to make a fabulous sushi dinner.  She has to know how to clean and how to give a first-rate ashiatsu massage (that’s when someone walks along your back). 

How awesome would that be?  Yes, most awesome indeed.  It would be nice to get a mail order groom, but I don’t think the japanese culture trained their men to be docile house-husbands waiting on their women while having their feet bound and deformed.

I want the real deal.  I want her to dress in geisha garb and paint her face white so I have something pretty to look at while she pours me sake.  I want her to do the whole feng shui thing to my house and then stick my body full of acupuncture needles.  Can acupuncture needles cause an orgasm?  Who needs a husband if that’s the case?

I set up an account with International Cupid.  You can see my profile at: http://www.internationalcupid.com/en/profile/showProfile/ID/689969

Lol, I just want to see if it works.  Okay, now I really need to pick my friend up from the airport. 

Blogging made my restlessness go away  🙂


I finally got someone interested in me!  Her name is Ella.

She better know how to wear a kimono and serve me sake as long as she’s living with me, my parents and OCDC.

1 Comment

Filed under humor

One response to “I want a mail order bride

  1. Steph

    OMG you crack me up!

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